Setting Boundaries™ with Your Aging Parents by Allison Bottke

Author:Allison Bottke
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780736926744
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.

Respecting People’s Boundaries

To respect people means to hold them in high regard and esteem, to value them, and to consider them as deserving. In the questionnaire I distributed, I asked, “Can adult children honor and respect their aging parents while disagreeing with their choices and establishing firm boundaries with them? If so, how?”

Virtually every respondent said yes. However, the overriding caveat was that for the children to set firm boundaries, the aging parents must be able to cognitively understand their choices. If your aging parents are unable to understand right from wrong, the dynamics of setting and maintaining boundaries change. But let’s continue to assume our aging parents understand their choices—and those choices have been harmful to us for a long time. When people consistently behave negatively, they foster disrespect. We can respect a role—a position—but feel conflicted about respecting the person.

A time may come when we must disconnect from our parents because of this difference. Should this occur, we must express our feelings in love and honor. In some cases, this will require a Herculean effort—and nothing less than God’s amazing grace and mercy.

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